Suzanne Mercier - Monday, May 03, 2010
Recently, I read Seth Godin's blog about bad behaviour and irrational decisions being almost always caused by fear. Seth's point is that we could change the dysfunctional behaviour by addressing the fear, yet we don't. We blame other people for what goes wrong in our lives.
I was inspired to expand on the concept.
There are so many reasons for this dysfunctional behaviour starting with learning, as we grew older, that making mistakes is not acceptable and results in punishment in some form. When we blame others, we are also failing to take responsibility and accountability for creating the whole of our universe. But we're the ones who miss out. When we blame others, we lose the opportunity to learn and we miss the chance to change the outcome because we're busy waiting for those who really caused it to recognise their mistake and fix it. How many of us have done that at some stage!
Sure it's commonly the case that there is more than one person involved in any situation. And each person engaged in the situation has influenced that situation in some way. The opportunity for us is to examine our own behaviour. Were you happy with the outcome? If not, why not? What did you contribute to the result? How did you respond? Why did you respond that way? What were the thoughts and feelings that prompted your response? Really explore what was going on for you because your answers will hold an insight for you and the key to change the outcome next time.
By taking responsibility, you are stepping into your own power rather than giving it away to someone else as you wait for that other person to change. Have you noticed that they usually don't? At least, they don't until we've changed first!
Let me know what you think. I'd love to hear.
All the very best
Suzanne
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