Fear stops us from asking for the sale

Suzanne Mercier - Saturday, November 28, 2009

     I've now been in business for myself for around 16 years and over that time frame, I've done heaps of selling courses with some very reputable and experienced sales trainers and coaches.  I've prepared great marketing materials.  I've had well planned cold calling campaigns in place, made appointments where I asked terrific questions, listened effectively and talked passionately about what I could offer.  I've developed great relationships, many of which are still in place today.  The thing I haven't done over that time ,though, is to ask for the sale or referral.  As long as I kept it soft and sweet and didn't turn it into a commercial conversation, I couldn't be turned down or rejected on a personal or business level.  Sounds crazy doesn't it:  to allow fear of something that hasn't even happened and quite possibly won't happen to stop me from doing something that I wanted to do and needed to do in order for my business to survive let alone grow.

     Fear brings out the need to control; the need to reduce uncertainty.  When we feel that fear, we tend to pull back into the centre of our comfort zone - the sweet spot - in order to reduce the discomfort of feeling fearful.  However, fear is simply a piece of information that tells us we are venturing into an area that is unfamiliar and where we don't know the rules.  I really admire people who feel that fear and get excited because they know they are at the outer reaches of their comfort zone and about to have a breakthrough.  I admire their courage and faith that they will be OK and that they are right to push through.  If you've experienced the exhilaration of pushing through something you didn't think you could do, then you know what I'm talking about.  You feel as though you could take on the world.

     So, coming back to fear stopping us from "selling", how would it be if we recognised that there are lots of reasons people don't buy and most of them are not about us.  They may include situational issues like timing and resources.  There may be someone else who is offering them EXACTLY what they need or who has experience within the potential client's company or industry.  

     How about for 2010, you decide that you are going to go for it; that you are going to put yourself forward and ask for opportunities and referrals.  If and when you get a knockback, a constructive way to handle it could be to ask for the reasons - what could I improve; what would have made this a more attractive offer for you?  Make it about the service you offer, not about your identity.

     What could 2010 hold for you if you dared to ask?  A new job?  New cilents?  A promotion?  Salary increase?  It will hold whatever you ask for ... and believe you deserve.

     What do you think?  I'd love to hear.

Thanks.
Suzanne